An Ode to Valentine’s Day for the Single Folk

Valentine’s Day can be a confronting time for single folks.

We see roses adorning shop windows, chocolates and flowers being delivered to our offices, and couples out and about holding hands.

Perhaps it reminds us of relationships we’re no longer in.

Perhaps it reminds us of mistakes we’ve made.

It can reopen wounds from childhood.

It can make us feel like we’re not enough.

But being single should be a time to be savored.

It is an opportunity.

It’s an opportunity to both work on ourselves, and learn to accept and love ourselves just as we are.

We can use the time to develop our emotional intelligence.

We can use it to develop our skills and take up new hobbies.

We can use it to travel and go on adventures.

We can use it to better understand who we are, and what we are capable of.

We can use it to become more compelling individuals and as a result, attract the right people into our lives.

When we learn to do that, we enter into relationships for the right reasons — not merely because we need ‘completing’ or validating, or because we are looking to fill gaps.

It’s much worse to be in the wrong relationship than it is to be in no relationship at all.

When we learn to love and accept ourselves unconditionally, when we enter relationships with our emotional intelligence intact, we set ourselves up to be loving, empathetic, and supportive partners — not starting a fight or withdrawing every time something triggers our inner child or sense of self, as is often the case with many romantic relationships.

If you’re single, be compassionate to yourself this Valentine’s Day.

And use this time wisely.

Work on yourself as you would work on a relationship.

Nothing is permanent, and sometime in the future when you are all coupled up, you might find yourself longing for the relative freedom you enjoyed in the past.

Enjoy it while it lasts.